Tuesday, April 7, 2015

To My Father (for deverse; writing letters)

Dear Dad,

So much has happened since you passed. The girls are grown, Jazzy has a beautiful
little boy, named Benjamin who plays the Ukelele and dances like you wouldn’t believe.
When I first held him, he reminded me so much of you, an old soul, kind and gentle.

Chrissy is expecting her first a little girl in a couple of weeks, who we call Baby P. because she and her husband can’t decide on a name yet.

I had another daughter, Kayla you never had the chance to meet. She is in her first year of college and she too, reminds me of you with her sharp wit and Strawberry blonde hair.

Mom passed away six years ago, we never managed to find the closeness we should have. I know she was lonely, I just didn’t know how to fill that space. The years have often been unkind and still I wake up each day looking for the joy I know still exists.

Dan’s sister Phyllis, who I loved dearly died two years before I had Kay. I miss her so much. His other sister, Linda passed away last June, just as we were becoming close. I had just found out two months before, I have Rheumatoid Arthritis and now Dan is in a rehabilitation center, he had a stroke on February 24 of this year. He is not doing well. I don't know if he will ever be able to come home.

I am so grateful that Marcia and I have become close like sisters should be. She has been a tremendous source of strength and support during this terrible time. I don't know what I would do without her. I appreciate her so much and what a blessing to have her in my life. 

I think of you often, what a wonderful father you were to me and how unfair to have lost you when you were only 53, the same age I am now. I feel there is so much to be grateful for in spite of all the heartache. You taught me how to be strong and keep my sense of humor and I am trying to retain both in the midst of all the heartache. I miss you dad. .I wish you were here to hold me.

                                                                                                                   Love Lisa


  1. A very honest and moving letter. I am blessed to still have my two parents but I think I can understand how you miss your dad.

  2. I lost both of my dads. This was beautiful.

  3. Its so sad to see these milestones without him - childrens lifetimes and happy and sad events too. I feel the same way - my dad has been gone 21 years now. Thanks for sharing your beautiful memories with us.

  4. This is a very heartfelt letter, Lisa. It is very apparent how close you were to your father & how strongly you miss his presence in your life today. You really have experienced so many losses, haven't you?

  5. This is such a tender, nostalgic letter, Lisa. It makes me reflect--what has happened since I lost some of my loved ones? What have they missed?

  6. I can feel the pain of loss that weaves through this letter. It is truly difficult to reach life's milestones and most significant events without one or both parents. I can relate as I lost my dad when I was 22.

  7. I can feel your love for him. Thanks for sharing it.

  8. Lisa... Absolutely amazing. I am out and out Daddy's girl and I am terrified of losing either one of them. Touching words here.

  9. This one wrenched at my heart. I understand the loss of a parent. My mom was 41 when she passed, and my dad passed 9 years later at 51. I have been blessed to outlive both of their ages, and I still ache for the things they never got to see, that we never got to share. A very heartfelt letter here.

  10. The conversational, informational tone of this letter hits hardest because it's these things that we desperately desire to share with the loved ones that we have lost and miss the most.

  11. This is so tender and heartfelt, the depth of your love and sorrow at losing him so evident. Though the years have often been unkind, noting the blessings of children and grandchildren and rewarding relationships helps the heartache. Hugs, friend.

  12. Moving write... It's a blessing to have experienced that love and have memories... I didn't have a dad around at all growing up.

  13. This was very touching. It made me think of my own dad, who passed away before my son was born. My son reminds me so much of him, too. Peace, Linda

  14. A beautiful story it is to honor a father of 53 years of living in all the love that is there before in living memory of a father's love.. loving goes on in the loving eyes of child well loved...

    And it does remind me that even in 53 years of a father who lives to be 81..

    he is there but he never allows me to get to know him at all..

    Ah.. the distance of the heart...

    is the longest distance of all....

    farther than life

    or death

    for all...:)

    The only place for me

    to ever find the love of a father

    is in the mirror.... and that's okay..too..:)

  15. This one broke my heart in pieces--and I can only hope that, like you, some day I'll have a close relationship with estranged siblings. God bless you.

  16. What a beautiful letter! You make me want t write letters to my own dear dead.


I love to hear from you, please leave your comment below.